Chapter Seventy-Six: No Ifs

Inside the Lingyu Pavilion.

News had just arrived—Su Yi, who had gone out, had returned! Gu Xinyu hurried back to the Lingyu Pavilion. He certainly couldn’t neglect his own brother, and truth be told, he was rather curious about what had happened between them these past few days.

Su Yi was seated in the inner chamber, sipping tea and taking a moment to rest. Someone had already gone to inform Gu Xinyu, so he should be back soon. A thought seemed to occur to Su Yi, and he broke into a bright smile.

“Su Yi, you’re finally back!” His voice rang out before he appeared, a habit entirely characteristic of Gu Xinyu.

Moments later, Gu Xinyu ascended from the stairwell. Su Yi beckoned him over. “Xinyu, you returned quickly, too. Why weren’t you holding down the fort at the Pavilion?”

Taking a seat across from Su Yi, Gu Xinyu poured himself a cup of tea, drained it in one gulp, and wiped his mouth with a sweep of his sleeve—carefree and unconstrained as always.

Glancing at Su Yi, who showed no sign of anything unusual, Gu Xinyu was itching to ask what had transpired over the past fortnight. But for now, it seemed better to answer the question at hand.

“Earlier, because of Yinyao’s plan and Ji Muyu’s movements, everything has now begun in earnest. To ensure nothing could go awry, I handled the arrangements personally. After all, we can’t let the Lingyu Pavilion lose face.”

“Oh!” Su Yi understood at once. Dealing with Ji Muyu was no trivial matter; it was only right that their own people took charge to guarantee success.

Unable to quell his curiosity, Gu Xinyu leaned forward, excitement in his eyes. Seeing that Su Yi was in good spirits, now seemed as good a time as any to ask. After all, Su Yi no longer remembered his past—no matter what Gu Xinyu asked, he wouldn’t grasp the true meaning.

“Su Yi, you left in such a hurry—did you manage to catch up with Yinyao? And, well, how did things go? Did anything... happen between you and Yinyao?” His tone was half gossip, half concern. Why did he feel that things among Yinyao, Su Yi, and that Li Su were becoming more and more complicated...

“Oh, right. Yinyao told me something,” Su Yi said, his words laden with deeper significance, only heightening Gu Xinyu’s curiosity. Yet...

Sure enough, Gu Xinyu flashed a mischievous smile, clearly up to no good. “Tell me, tell me—what did Yinyao say to you?”

“Do you really want to know?” Su Yi deliberately dangled the answer before him, refusing to give it up so easily.

“Of course I do!”

“Then I’ll tell you.” As he spoke, a cunning smile flickered across Su Yi’s face.

“Say it!” Gu Xinyu realized Su Yi was teasing him on purpose.

“Yinyao told me that you, Muye, and Aishuo are all old friends of hers.” Su Yi paused deliberately, watching Gu Xinyu’s reaction carefully.

Gu Xinyu was confused—why would Yinyao suddenly mention this to Su Yi? It was true, but wasn’t she afraid he’d get suspicious? After all, out of the four, three were close to her, but Su Yi alone barely knew her. Wasn’t this just inviting doubt?

Determined not to betray his thoughts, Gu Xinyu maintained his usual look of curiosity, even managing a “that’s just how it is” expression.

Having gotten what he wanted, Su Yi continued, “You three all know each other, but I don’t. Naturally, that struck me as odd, so I asked Yinyao if there was something she knew that I didn’t.”

!!!

At this point, if Gu Xinyu could still keep his composure, he wouldn’t be Gu Xinyu. How had the conversation ended up here? Su Yi’s mind was as sharp as ever, cutting straight to the heart of the matter!

Suppressing his shock, Gu Xinyu forced a laugh. “So, how did Yinyao answer you?”

Pretending not to notice Gu Xinyu’s now obvious reaction, Su Yi sighed, his face tinged with melancholy. “Yinyao said she does indeed know things I don’t—and she added that you, Muye, and Aishuo all know them too.”

Gu Xinyu was dumbstruck. Why would Yinyao say that? Didn’t she know that keeping it unspoken was their unspoken agreement? Why would she reveal it? Yinyao wasn’t the reckless type—if she said it, something must have happened. He would have to find her and get to the bottom of it!

Every flicker of emotion on Gu Xinyu’s face was noted by Su Yi, confirming that Gu Xinyu indeed knew things he himself did not. Which meant Muye and Aishuo knew as well.

Seeing Su Yi’s expression, Gu Xinyu realized he’d already given himself away. He dreaded Su Yi pressing further, demanding answers about things he was not supposed to know.

Gu Xinyu’s face shifted through a dozen expressions. Su Yi observed with amusement. Was he really that afraid Su Yi would dig to the root?

Su Yi offered a reassuring smile. “Xinyu, don’t worry. I won’t press you. Just as Yinyao said—if you all wish to tell me, you will, without me needing to ask. I’ll do as Yinyao suggests and let things take their natural course.”

Inwardly, Gu Xinyu breathed a sigh of relief—thank heavens! Yinyao, well done!

Knowing he was in the wrong, Gu Xinyu tried to smooth things over with a grin. “Heh, Su Yi, when the time is right, I’ll tell you everything.”

Su Yi nodded in agreement. “Just as Yinyao said, you all feel the time hasn’t come, so you’re not telling me yet.”

Gu Xinyu inwardly shouted: Yinyao, could you be any more accurate?

To mask his guilt, Gu Xinyu laughed it off. “Exactly! It’s just not the right time yet.”

…

Elsewhere in the Pavilion, Yinyao rubbed her nose—why did she suddenly feel the urge to sneeze?

“Yao’er, what’s wrong?” Li Su asked with concern at her slightly awkward expression.

“It’s nothing! Let’s get back to our plans,” Yinyao replied, smiling faintly as she shifted her focus back to their discussion.

After another glance to ensure she was truly alright, Li Su returned his attention to the table.

…

Wracked with guilt, Gu Xinyu managed to discuss business with Su Yi for another hour before finally “escaping” the Pavilion. Yes, escaping! He was nearly beside himself with anxiety—blame Yinyao for saying such things! She’d left him more and more uneasy.

Still, it was thanks to her that Su Yi had agreed to let things unfold naturally instead of demanding explanations. Otherwise, Gu Xinyu would have been completely lost for words.

As soon as he left the Pavilion, the first place Gu Xinyu thought to go was the Hidden Sect. He needed to find Yinyao and have a proper talk with her!

“Master, Gu Xinyu, Lord of Lingyu Pavilion, seeks an audience!” The knock came at the door, and with no answer from within, the servant guessed those inside were busy and spoke his message aloud.

Upon hearing Gu Xinyu’s name, Yinyao arched her brows—speak of the devil! Li Su immediately understood her meaning. “Well, let him in!”

“Yes, sir!”

Yinyao rose and opened the door, heading with Li Su toward the main hall to receive their unexpected guest. The timing, she thought, was impeccable—she and Li Su had just finished discussing their next step, planning to summon Su Yi or Gu Xinyu. And now, here was Gu Xinyu himself, clearly with something urgent to say.

A thought occurred to Yinyao—she had a good idea why Gu Xinyu had come.

Led into the hall, he saw Yinyao and Li Su both present. As he entered, they rose in greeting.

“Xinyu, speak of the devil! We were just about to send for you and Su Yi,” Yinyao said with a smile.

Casting a glance at Li Su, Gu Xinyu then turned to Yinyao. “This time, I’m not here about the plan. I have some private matters to discuss with Yinyao. My apologies—could I trouble the Sect Leader to excuse us? Or perhaps, Yinyao, you could step outside with me?”

Yinyao understood at once. As she’d suspected, he’d come because of that matter.

Li Su looked to Yinyao—he didn’t mind, though he was curious about what private business this could be.

“Li Su, send a copy of the plan to Su Yi. I’ll visit him in person next time—after all, it’s not something you can grasp at a glance,” Yinyao instructed.

“Very well.” With that, Li Su departed.

Yinyao raised her brows at Gu Xinyu. “Let’s go, then.”

Gu Xinyu frowned, following Yinyao out of the Hidden Sect. It seemed she already guessed his purpose—just as well, it would save him the trouble of explaining.

At the teahouse.

Their usual window seat. Yinyao lounged in her chair, lazy as a cat. “Well? What did Su Yi do to you? No need to look at me as though I owe you the world…”

Gu Xinyu, realizing he’d been sulking ever since they left the Sect, finally dropped his pretense. “Yinyao, what’s the meaning of this? Why did you tell Su Yi about that? Aren’t you the one who most wants him not to remember?”

Taking a sip of tea, Yinyao met his gaze. “Do you know what Su Yi said to me?”

“Huh? Now what did he say to you? One minute you’re talking to him, the next he’s talking to you—this is all a bit much…” Gu Xinyu was rather bewildered.

“Su Yi said he feels an inexplicable familiarity with me, that he worries for me without quite knowing why. He said he can somehow always sense what I’m thinking. He feels as if he’s forgotten something important.” Yinyao spoke as calmly as she could.

Gu Xinyu fell silent—this, he had not expected. Why would Su Yi say such things? Did it mean…?

Watching his reaction, Yinyao voiced her own suspicion. “You guessed right—I think it’s very likely he’ll regain his memory. You know as well as I do, Dreamwake is not without its flaws.”

“So, you chose to hint at the truth. That way, even if he does recover his memory, he won’t blame or resent us, right?” Gu Xinyu blurted out his thoughts in one breath.

Yinyao blinked, something veiled in her eyes. “More or less.”

With her confirmation, what more could Gu Xinyu say? She was right—Dreamwake was not flawless. There were ways to restore lost memories, but it all depended on the will of the one who took it… Since Su Yi had already begun to show signs of awakening, all they could do was wait and see whether this was a fleeting phase or the true return of his memories.

“Aren’t you afraid he’ll remember?” Gu Xinyu’s question was blunt.

“I am, and I’m not,” Yinyao answered, meeting his gaze directly. “I’m afraid for the very reason you worry—our past. But I’m not afraid, because it is already the past. Isn’t that so?”

Gu Xinyu nodded. That was indeed the truth.

He glanced at Yinyao, finally voicing the question he’d long harbored. “Is it really impossible between you and him?”

Yinyao lowered her head, hiding her eyes. After a moment, she looked up again, face composed, and met his gaze. “Perhaps.”

Gu Xinyu had his answer. She hadn’t said “impossible”—only “perhaps.” Which meant anything was possible. There was still a chance, wasn’t there? When his memory returned, would that be a blessing or a curse? He could not say.

Yinyao gave a bitter laugh. She was not one to fall in love easily, let alone give her heart. Everything that had passed between her and Ji Xuanyu—Su Yi—she had truly cared, even risking her life to protect him as he had done for her. If not for that accident… if only…

But there were no “if onlys.”

Li Su.

Xuanyu.

What am I to do?